Ever felt like life is a bit lackluster?
Like there must be more to it than this?
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And that we should all be on a quest to find it?
Some may call this fleeting and elusive feeling we are searching for “happiness”. This five dollar word gets thrown around, to sum up, what a ton of us seem to be striving for. Combine this with the idea that we should be “happy” all of the time and this becomes the perfect recipe for feeling that a) we aren’t good enough and b) there is something missing from our lives so we proceed to spend money, focus on our outer appearance, insert additional self-deprecating behaviours here.
I have spent a lot of time thinking about happiness. Like a lot. And I have been on a massive quest, changing a lot of things in my life in the pursuit of finding happiness.
Wait…I know what you are thinking.
But first, let me tell you. I am not unhappy. I just feel the pressure to be happier. How is that even possible?
Here’s how. I am goal-driven, a perfectionist and a problem-solver.
When I’ve felt a gap in my happiness on my scale of 1 to 10, I’ve felt the need to solve that gap. I start feeling that there is more out there and I could be better at being happy. Sound familiar?
When you have all of these characteristics combined, it is the perfect storm and you fight like hell to get to that 10. That’s just what you do.
I’m pleased to tell you I’ve arrived.
I’m no longer concerned about being 100% on my scale of happiness. In fact, I don’t scale it anymore. This definition of happiness I created was a mythical destination that never existed. Happiness isn’t a destination but rather a living, breathing thing.
Happiness is a purpose that molds and changes as we do. State of calm achieved.
Let me explain how the steps to take:
Step 1: Define your personal values
Step 2: Fight like hell to align your life and career with them
Step 3: Define your personal goals
Step 4: Set out on a purposeful quest daily, weekly or monthly to achieve them and work towards them
Optional: Pick a soul mate that shares these values and goals
That’s it. That’s all. Simple right?
It’s only taken 32 years, a $250/hr mentor and a shit ton of reflection. Save your money and the heartache and do the work above.
When your life or career is out of alignment with your values, you won’t be happy.
When you aren’t striving towards any goals in a purposeful way, you won’t feel fulfilled.
You were looking for the coles notes? There it is.